Show Us Your Boob Job

Lori Shepler / Los Angeles Times

"I'm so scared girls look at my breast implants and think, 'To get boys, you need big boobs.' I tell them, 'Don't get it done. Those fears go away. You develop other insecurities, but breasts aren't one of them.' " Jenny Mccarthy

Okay, let's talk about boobs. No, not politicians. Actual breasts. Specifically a Spring Break contest held--where else--in a California nightclub. The prize being--what else--a boob job.

Yes, you heard right. Some teenage girl just won herself free breast augmentation surgery during a Limbo contest and a final "Bobbing for Boobs" contest at the V20 Nightclub in Long Beach, CA.

Hey, every nightclub needs a gimmick. And apparently many girls who've heard those immortal Spring Break words, "Show us your t*ts!" believe they need bigger ones.

So that's the rationale behind "The Spring Break Breast Augmentation Contest Series," tongue-twister brainchild of 23-year-old promoter Jason DeLeon. Just 23 and already a marketing genius. His parents must be so proud.

In Jason's own words, "We just thought that the No. 1 reason people come to the club is, of course, girls. So how would we attract that demographic? Plastic surgery. It's what they're into."

Jason's company--yep, he has his own company, too--will pay the plastic surgeon, Dr. Karl Nguyen for the surgery. Dr. Nguyen didn't want to be interviewed about the contest, making me wonder how his own parents might feel. Or, maybe he has a daughter with boob issues of her own.

Far too many girls today have breast, body, self-esteem issues. More than a thousand showed up for that dinky contest in Long Beach. "It's always nice to get free boobies," said contestant Tracy Boi. And "Lanle" (no last name) had her reasons for joining in: "To get boobs. More self-esteem."

Imagine if one of the TV networks grabbed--uh, purchased--Jason's idea and took it national. Our sick pop culture already displayed in magazines, TV shows, movies and the celebration of celebrity role models virtually guarantees gazillions of tiny teens with A and B cups would line up around the block for a chance to go under the knife.

That's the scary part. Kids having unnecessary elective surgery to meet some unrealistic ideal. What an image: fake breasts perched unnaturally on the chests of girls who are--no matter the fancy make-up and hottie outfits--still children. And who should be expanding their brains, not their potential sex appeal.

I'm not opposed to plastic surgery -- I believe in nose jobs, for example. If the expectations are realistic and the doctor carefully chosen, a smaller honker can make a girl look better and feel better about herself. Really. I know.

And hey, I'm a Baby Boomer, I might want some "freshening" myself someday. As an adult I have the right to make those decisions and the maturity to cope with potential mistakes. I know other adult women who've had breast surgery. Some for augmentation. Too many for mastectomy reconstruction.

They all had genuine reasons for risking surgery. Bottom line, I believe in a woman's right to choose what happens to her own body. Notice I said woman.

But c'mon, a contest offering Boobies for Babies is just plain wrong.