A War By Any Other Name Still Stinks

The Advertising Slogan Generator

"War is not nice." Barbara Bush

If I hadn't read the latest Bush obfuscation outrage in the New York Times, I wouldn't have believed it. Just when you think there's no way the Administration could stink up the joint any worse, they hand us a bloody, smelly rose.

The Global War on Terror is no more! Don't get too excited. They ditched the Slogan, not the war. We are now engaged in a--wait for it: Global Struggle Against Violent Extremism.

Are they freakin kidding me?? These geniuses have just figured out two basic facts we've all known since Hector was a pup:

Fact # 1. If a war is unpopular, don't call it a "War." Wow. What a concept. Think "Police Action" in Korea. And the ever popular "Vietnam Conflict." Jeezus! How dumb do they think we are?

Fact # 2. When terrorists are dropping bombs around the world, claiming outrage over the War in Iraq, perhaps it's time to consider the bigger picture. You know, political, diplomatic and economic ramifications as well as military ones. May I just add: Well, DUH.

Here's some pith in the Times article, direct from the horse's ass's mouth:

Gen. Richard B. Myers, chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, told the National Press Club on Monday that he had "objected to the use of the term 'war on terrorism' before, because if you call it a war, then you think of people in uniform as being the solution."

Yeah, right. All those innocent citizens ducking bombs in London, Madrid, Egypt, Israel and America think soldiers in Iraq are really going to solve the problem. Hard to solve anything when your presence is the problem -- or when you're dead too.

Although the military is heavily engaged in the mission now, he said, future efforts require "all instruments of our national power, all instruments of the international communities' national power." The solution is "more diplomatic, more economic, more political than it is military," he concluded.

Ya think? Where have these bozos been, under a rock? Well, in fact, yes. The Rock of Ages -- you know, where "Jesus is the answer." I just have to ask, What the Hell is the question?

Administration and Pentagon officials say the revamped campaign has grown out of meetings of President Bush's senior national security advisers that began in January, and it reflects the evolution in Mr. Bush's own thinking nearly four years after the Sept. 11 attacks.

That's truly my favorite part. President Bush's thinking "evolved" over four years into recognizing that the disgustingly dirty tactics of terrorism can't be addressed by military might alone? And that their bogus war is in fact a major part of the problem? Evolved is a good word here in the case of Mr. Bush -- it proves Darwin was right. And I am (well, I was) speechless at the idea that it took this group of idiots six months to change four words -- but not one single mind.

Think about this: The acronym for the new Bush Administration slogan, Global Struggle Against Violent Extremism, is G-SAVE.

Nuff said.