Anna Nicole - Legacy of Lunacy

"One of the few good things about modern times: If you die on television, you will not have died in vain. You will have entertained us." Kurt Vonnegut

Bimbo Alert: Anna Nicole Smith is still dead (tip of the hat to the original Sat Night Live). She will be continue to be dead until the news media has milked her life and sudden demise for all it's worth. Then she will be gone.

So settle down, People. None of it means a hoot in hell to any of us. A former Playmate, model, reality show star and all around screw-up died, not the Pope.

Oh right, like you cried when you heard. Puh-lease.

Anna Nicole Smith was a gal on the make, one step up (or down) from trailer-trash, who used her body to find fame and fortune. She wasn't the first and she won't be the last.

But if she used her brain to make any other contribution, I haven't heard of it. Oh yes, she convinced a horny old man to marry her. She hired smart lawyers (it remains to be seen if they're worth the huge fees) to try to get a whopping share of her late husband's estate.

What else did she do? Cure cancer? Create world peace? Okay, granted, not expected of her. But did she leave a body of work (so to speak), a legacy of some sort of achievement that could inspire others to aspire to greatness?

Not unless we want our children to become sex-crazed druggies with no moral compass and even less self-esteem or sense of responsibility. Not unless we want to offer them a legacy of lunacy as a guide to life.

The real tragedy of her own son's death can be traced to his mother's influence, or lack of same.

The real tragedy of her own mother's loss of a grandson and now a daughter (and possibly a granddaughter) can be traced to that daughter's life of decadent excess ... perhaps due to her own mother's failings.

We'll never know. Doesn't matter. Dead is dead.

Well, wait. There's the baby, Dannielynn. And the DNA Daddy Derby. The jewel in that crown, its creepiest contender, hands down is Zsa Zsa's husband, the Prince of Weird.

I do feel sorry for poor Dannielynn. No amount of money in the world will make up for the legacy of lunacy left by her grandmother, brother, mother and whichever father earns that dubious title.

Here's the latest headline--from CBS News no less--in this incredible circus: Photos of Anna Nicole Smith in bed with Bahamas immigration minister revive scandal

The scandals will keep on comin'. Anna Nicole Smith is still dead.